This one is short and sweet. Yesterday I went into a phone store to get a new charger. I told the three-year-old assistant hovering by the phones what I needed. He grabbed one and led me to the till where I struck up a bit of witty repartee:
Me: I don’t know what I do with them, I keep buying them and leaving them places…
Him: Silent bar a look that seemed to say ‘Madam, I could not care where you leave them, why are you talking to me?’
Me: Anyway, I’m really good customer, is there any chance of a discount?
Him: A look of panic. He wasn’t expecting this. He pauses for a second then: ‘Er, no madam, unfortunately I’m not able to do that.’
Me (grinning madly): Are you sure? I’m really, really good customer. My bills are crazy every month…
Him: A look that suggests that not only are my bills crazy, I may be crazy and he might have to call his manager soon. ‘Er, sorry, no.’
The customer, at the till next to me, breaks off from her conversation about roaming charges to give me a once up and down. I think she’s trying to see what kind of nutter/cheapskate I am. But maybe that’s in my head. She smirks. I smirk back.
Me (still grinning): OK! No worries!
Him: Confused and relieved. Smiles.
It was quite funny actually. I would usually be quite mortified in this situation, in case people thought I was a cheapskate, but yesterday I could not care less. I think my coffee shop romance has made my skin grow an extra layer thick. I am (temporarily at least) invincible.