Last night I went to the pub

Last night I got the train from my mum’s house in the burbs back to my friend’s house in London. When I arrived, I walked past a bar and I told myself that I deserved a drink after the crappy day I’d had. I told myself that one fall off the wagon would not be the end of the world. I went in.

This is what I knew that a glass of red wine would do for me:

1) it would be an instant way to change the way I was feeling
2) It would allow me to feel properly angry and sorry for myself.
3) Then by the bottom of the first glass I’d feel calmer and better and things would matter less, it would be like being in a helicopter and looking down.

BUT THE FUNNIEST THING HAPPENED. I walked up to the bar and was fully prepared to ask for a glass of red but it wouldn’t come out. Instead I said ‘A tap water please’ and sat down and drank that. My mouth would not say Red Wine. A real first.

I then went home and made a giant cheesy pasta. With cream. Comfort eating has replaced my comfort drinking. If you can add cheese, chocolate or cream to it, I’ll do it and then add double. Oh well, f**k It…

xx

PS the bad mood continues but I’m going to write a post on that tomorrow. Today is not the day. Thank you to everyone who has shared their grumps and sent supportive emails. Big congratulations to Louize and Vickie on the 30 Day Challenge Progress.
Today Louize is finishing her 30 at 30 (which involves nothing but whole foods, no sugar, booze, carbs etc for 30 days) and Vickie has been meditating her heart out on an Oprah course and really feeling the benefit from it – that and running, and clearing out her in-box every day.
If you’re not doing so well, no worries. Just get back on the horse if you want to or don’t if you don’t. That’s the F**K It Approach to the Seven Habits.

3 thoughts on “Last night I went to the pub

  1. Zoë

    Hello! I did pretty well yesterday – went to the gym (which is just usual for Monday, not part of the challenge –and Monday only mind you, let’s not make me sound more righteous than I deserve), and afterward was so tired I couldn’t do any housework before retiring to the couch. I did, however, drink my cloudy apple cider vinegar tonic. A couple hours of TV later I almost said F**k it, I’m too tired – but instead I put away a box of stuff in my tiny hallway I’d been meaning to get rid of for a while.

    Then this morning I took out the recycling before work. Check and check! And there is no way I would have done either if it weren’t for holding myself accountable here 😛

    And now a big yay for your resolve to stay away from the wine! Very impressive self-discipline! Hope you figure out whatever will help improve mood – try not to let things you can’t control affect your well-being. Wasn’t there a post about that with more self-helpy language? Something about spheres you can change and ones you can’t? Wee reminder in case it’s appropriate 😉 xo

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  2. JohnC

    Well done, Marianne, for not drinking though you are setting yourself up for comments like ‘One quiche for the road’, ‘I’ll have a double pizza on the rocks’ & then bursting out into song with ‘Roll out the burger’ or my favourite ‘Eat it’ by “Weird”Al Yankovic.

    You could end up by being the designated diner when your girlfriends take you out

    XXXXX

    JC

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