Tag Archives: Feel the fear and do it anyway

What’s happening with the book?!

Screen Shot 2016-02-01 at 10.02.42I bumped into an ex-boyfriend of a friend of mine last Friday night.

He had been going out with my friend while I was in the early, exciting, jump out of planes, do stand-up comedy and naked modelling stage of the blog – and he’d witnessed a lot of the craziness/excitement up close. It was lovely to see him.

‘What’s happening with the book?’ he asked. ‘I’ve been looking on Amazon. I even tried to get on Brazilian Amazon to buy it.’

‘Is there a Brazilian Amazon?’ I asked.

‘I don’t know, I kept getting links to the rainforest,’ he said. ‘But what’s happening? Can I buy it? Is out yet?’

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Feel the fear and go to the hospital AND the dentist on the most miserable day of the year

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So yesterday was something called ‘Blue Monday’ – one of those made up days meant to depict the fact that it’s the middle of January, the New Year’s resolutions have been abandoned and life is generally crap.

A great day, then, to face not one but two of my fears – going to the hospital to get a mole checked out and getting my fillings done.

Who says the universe doesn’t have a sense of humour?

First up was the hospital appointment – which I’d not been dreading so much as completely ignoring.

A bit of background: when I was 18, I had a dodgy mole on the inside of my left calf, which turned out to be a malignant melanoma – one of the most serious types of skin cancer.

It was a very scary time. I was meant to be starting university but instead I was in hospital having a sizeable chunk of my leg removed while the word cancer was being thrown around.

I didn’t realise it at the time – my parents didn’t tell me – but the kind I had is fatal in about a third of cases.

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Feel the fear and love your fridge

A few people have been asking me the very reasonable question of whether my daring deeds are making me feel happier and more confident. The answer is, I don’t know. Right now, they’re making me feel tired.

But on the whole it’s been good.

The main benefit has been that I don’t have time to over-analyse little things as I normally do. I wake up every morning and think ‘God, what is it today?’ (It’s karaoke tonight) and just get on with it. Well, sort of. I panic a bit but it’s getting less with each day.

Last week parallel parking was freaking me out but compared to getting your kit off for strangers, it’s a breeze.  I’ve noticed little changes too: I’ve been sending off important emails in seconds, instead of faffing for hours as I usually do.

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How Post-its can change your life

I’ve just walked around the block, talking to myself. I told myself that I’m strong and capable and that good things are coming my way. I assured myself that I handle everything with calm and ease and that money comes to me easily and effortlessly. I’ve repeated, about 80 times, ‘It’s all happening perfectly.’

I am now sitting at a desk, surrounded by these:

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Yup. I’ve finally lost it. I’m fallen down the self-help rabbit hole – and we’re only in week two.

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Feel the fear and get on the motorway

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Yesterday I drove on not one, not two, but three different motorways – the M25, M3 and M4. Fascinating stuff, I know.

I’m sure that this will be no big deal to most of you but I am quite a nervous driver on any road and a VERY NERVOUS driver on motorways.

‘Hard shoulders’, ‘slip lanes’, overtaking… I feel like I’m in some sort of computer game that I don’t want to be in – a game in which death is only one dodgy lane move away.

And because I’ve lived in London most of my life, without a car, I haven’t ever had to face my fear. Now I’m back in the burbs, it would make life a lot easier if I could get over it. So yesterday I drove to my friend in East Sheen, instead of taking the train as I usually would.

My heart was beating hard the whole time and I didn’t go above 60 (sorry to everyone behind me) – but I did it. I even went into fifth gear. I felt like The Stig.

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